Pano mhuri nemhuri zvinogona kuratidzirwa semapoka maduku "akavharwa", uye kune avo vari mukati mavo, chokwadi, "mukova unorambidzwa". Inoramba iine chokwadi chokuti mukudzidza kwehukama hwemhuri zvakaoma kutsvaga izvo chaizvoizvo zvakakonzera kukakavara mamiriro ezvinhu.
Zviratidzo zvishomanana, tinogona kugumisa kuti zvikonzero zvekuti pane kukakavadzana kwemhuri, pasina mubvunzo, zvikuru.
Vakaroorana vanogona kunge vasina matambudziko maererano nehupfumi. Zvisinei, kana vakaroorana vasingagoni kugara vachiratidza mafungiro akanaka uye zvakajeka kuti mumwe muwanano wekuroorana akagadzirira kutsigira munhu wese mune zvose, kukakavara kunogoneka. Kana mumwe murume asingakwanisi kubatsira uye kubatsira kukurira matambudziko akasiyana-siyana ehupenyu (kunyange kana asinganetseki kuti matambudziko acho achakundwa) - iyi ndeimwe rubatsiro rwemhirizhonga yakakomba.
Kana pasina hukama hwepedyo, pakupedzisira (kunyange kana muchato usingadi kuparadzaniswa), mumwe wevakaroorana ane utera husina simba, kusava nehupenyu hunoshingaira uye kushanda kwakakwirira, basa rokusika-izvi zvose zvinotungamirira kukakavadzana mumhuri pamwe nemamwe mimwe mimwe mimwe mikana, kurambana, mutongi. Zvakanyanya kuipa, hakungavi nekurambana, nokuti, somuenzaniso, mumwe wevakaroorana anoona mukuchengetedza mhuri yavo basa ravo kuvana vaduku, asi rudzi rwemhuri ruchave rwuri kana haruna kubatana uye rudo, kunzwisisa uye ukama hwepedyo vakaroorana ...
Pasinei nokuti zvikonzero zvipi, vose vanotaura kuti vakaroorana havana chinhu chikuru - kugutsikana kubva kune vakaroorana, kukwana kwehukama hwemhuri nekuwana mufaro kune zvose izvi.
Ngatitarisei zvikonzero nei kukakavadzana kwemhuri kune zvikonzero zvepedyo zvinowanzoitika. Mushure mezvose, ivo vanowanzova ibwe rekona rekurambana kana kuramba kusingagumi kwehupenyu pamwechete.
Chikonzero chekutanga ndechokunzwa kwekuninipiswa, kupesana, mumwe murume pamberi peumwe.
Kurwisana kwakawanda kunomuka pamusana pekuzviremekedza, kuzvikoshesa, kukosha kweshoko rokuti "Ndiri munyika ino" (usapesana ne "ego"). Munhu chero upi zvake achange achinyanya kunetseka apo nyaya dzekukanganisa kwechiremera chake pachacho dzinobatwa, apo paanoremekedzwa, apo, pakupedzisira, iye anongorapwa asingabvumirwi.
Apo mumwe wevakaroorana anonzwa akazununguka, achipesana nehafu yavo, izvi zvichaita kuti zvive nemafungiro asina kunaka mumhuri uye zvakanyanya kuve kusagutsikana, kusava nemaonero akanaka pakati pevanhu vaviri. Izvo zvisingabatsiri zvicharatidzirwa mu caress, unyoro hwevakaroorana kune mumwe nemumwe, vachimuchengeta (iye) uye zvirokwazvo mukuchengeta uye kudzidzisa vana vavo. Kuparadzanisa kwepfungwa pakati pevakaroorana kunotanga nekuderera kwakanyanya kweumwe wevakaroorana, nekutaura kwakakosha pamusoro pekuzivikanwa kweshamwari yavo. Nokudaro, kubatana kwemhuri, hukama hwehupenyu, kuzviratidza kunoputsika uye, zvakasiyana, manzwiro okusabatsira uye kukosha kune mumwe munhu anokura. Izvi zviitiko zvinotungamirira kune chokwadi chokuti mumuchato, munhu haakwanisi kuzvitaura semunhu anokosha kumumwe wake. Pane kudaro, zvinopesana, anotanga kunzwa sekunetseka kwepfungwa mumhuri yake, kune manzwiro ekudzivisa, kusachengeteka mune zvaanoita, kwete kukwanisa kuwana nzira yekubuda kune dzimwe nguva hupenyu (mhuri) mamiriro ezvinhu. Akarasikirwa nemanzwiro ekutsigirwa kubva kumudzimai wake (mudzimai), uye zvichibva zvinobvira kubva kune zvakapoteredza, pfungwa yekubatana uye kuchengeteka.
Murume anowanzova mumamiriro omunhu anenge achinyengetera kana kuti zvimwe achikumbira kushamwaridzana naye, iyo inobvumira mudzimai kuti anzwe simba rake pamusoro pemurume wake, kukwira kuchigaro choumambo. Nekukwirira kwakadai sekuda se "kadzikadzi ", iye zvichienderana nemafungiro ake angave anonyengera kumurume wake, achimuita kuti afare nechisarudzo chake, kana kuti akatsunga kurega zvirevo zvake" zvisina kukodzera ".
Murume asingazivi kubva pamashoko ose ehukama hwehukama hwemhuri (shure kwezvose, uku ndiko hukama hwepedyo, hwehupenyu hwevanhu vaviri, handizvo) hazvisi nyore kunzwisisa kuti nei murume kana mudzimai asinganyatsovhenekeri nemafungiro kana nehukadzi hunokwezva nekuzvidzwa kwakadai anotarisa paari, zvichida murume ane zvipo uye ane tarenda. Mhedziso yekuzvipupurira, kuzvidzora kwemurume muhukama hwakadaro kunotambudza zuva nezuva, izvo zvishoma nezvishoma zvinoderedza kutonhora mumhuri yemhuri, kunotsiva ukama hwakanaka nehutano kuverenga. Zvechokwadi, mamiriro akadaro haagoni kuramba kwenguva refu, nokuti mumwe nomumwe wedu haagoni kugamuchira mamiriro acho asingafadzi kwaari nokusingaperi. Izvo zvichaguma mune kukakavadzana kwakakomba kwepabonde nekupedzisira kuparadzana kwemhuri.
Chimwe chikonzero chekukakavadzana kwemhuri chakasimuka kune ivhu rakaoma ndiko kuonekwa kwemanzwiro emukadzi ekusemesa kune hukama hwepedyo, uye kwete kugutsikana sezvinofanira kuva.
Muchiitiko ichi, mubhedha wechipfuva ndewemukadzi chimwe chinhu chakaita nzvimbo yekutambudzwa. Zvechokwadi, kunyangadza kwechiito chepabonde chemudzimai kunotamirwa kumurume, uyo anozvida zvechokwadi. Uye mukadzi wacho anogara nemazino akavharidzirwa, ane manzwiro anogara aine mhosva (nokuti anotya kusurukirwa, manzwiro okusungirirwa vana), kana kutoramba murume wake muhukama hwepedyo. Zvechokwadi, kumhuri, migumisiro yemamiriro ezvinhu aya zvakare inotyisa. Mugumisiro wakadai uchasimuka kunyange nehuviri (uye mupfungwa, zvakare) kusakwanisa kwemurume kugutsa mudzimai wake.
Hatigoni kuregeredza chinhu chakadai senyota mubhedha.
Inofanirwa kutarisirwa kunyanya kushingaira. Yeuka, imba yekurara haisi nzvimbo yekupesana. Kunzwisisa mhirizhonga dzose nguva isati yapfuura.
Mukuwedzera kune izvi, zvepabonde hazvifaniri kutorwa sechinhu chakakosha (izvi zvinoitika kakawanda kunyange). Tinotora mhizha. Aida hove, akazarura firiji, akaita sandwich nokukurumidza, akageza tei kana soda. Aiwa, chirevo pano chinofanira kushandiswa nemafungiro akasiyana. Kuita zvepabonde kunofanira kufanana nekudya kwemavhenekeri kwemavhenekeri, asi munyaya iyi vaviri vacho havazombodzwi pamwe chete.
Kuvhiringidzika kwemanzwiro evanhu nevakadzi, kukakavadzana kune zvikonzero zvepedyo, uye muupenyu hwezuva nezuva hwemhuri - izvi zvose zvinowanzoitika uye muhukama hwakabatana. Asi mune chero zvipi zvayo, chimiro chechisikigo, chinogadziriswa chisarudzo chekupesana chinogona kunge chiri mutsa kana kukakavara. Izvi zvinonzwisisika sei?
Nemutsa muhupenyu hwemhuri, chinhu chinonyanya kukosha kubatana kwehukama, asi kukakavadzana hakusi kutungamirirwa nechokwadi kana ukama hwakanaka, asi nechishuvo chokuzvipira, kubuda kukunda, kuti sechikonzero, kuroorana uye kuzara kwehupenyu hwemhuri zvingachengetedzwa. Kunyangwe takaziva zvinhu zviviri zvinoita kuti kugadziriswa kwehukama hwemhuri huve nani, inofanira kutarirwa mupfungwa kuti kukakavadzana hakusi mhinduro chaiyo yedambudziko, sezvo zvichange, zvechokwadi, kuderedza hukama huno. Maitiro akanaka kwazvo mumhuri ndeyemhando ye "rudo" hukama, huri hwakakwirira kudarika chinzvimbo "Ndinogara ndakarurama, asi iwe hausi." Ukama hunokakavadzana hunoita kuti mhirizhonga iite, asiwo havagadzirise. Mumhuri umo kune kunzwisisa kwechimiro chakadai chehupenyu hwemhuri, hupenyu hwakareba uye hwakanaka hwewanano hunogona.
Uye, zvisinei, kana mumwe wevakaroorana, nokuda kwekuchengetedza rudo mumhuri akafunga kuenda nenzira yechipiri-kukakavadzana, kuratidza "kuti ini ndakarurama," apa tinofanira kufarira kushandisa nharo sechimiro chetsika, iyo inonyanya kugadzirisa kugadzirisa mamiriro ezvinhu. Uye hapana chakaoma mune izvi. Zvinotarisirwa, kune rumwe rutivi, zvakajeka (kufunga, kana uchida) kutaura pfungwa dzomunhu pasina kukanganisa mumwe wako nekusimudza inzwi rake, uye kune rumwe rutivi, kukwanisa kuziva kukodzera kwomurume wake, kukwanisa kuteerera izvi. Uye panguva imwe chete, hapana kana iwe unoda izvo zvinonzi "enda kune munhu", kuratidzira "ego" yako, unotaurirana, kana kuti, kuipa, kukanganisa. Vakaroorana havafanire kuti vasagumburwe nemanzwiro akaipa, kunyange mukugadzirisa kukakavadzana, kuratidza ruremekedzo kune mumwe nemumwe, yeuka kuti mumwe nomumwe wavo ane basa re "kusazvitsigira oga," uye kuti akunde mukukakavadzana chero kupi zvako, asi kusvika kuchokwadi, kureva. kune imwe nzira inofadza ivo vose. Nokuda kweizvi iwe unokwanisa kukwanisa kuteerera "wako" mumiririri, edza kunzwisisa nheyo yake, uye, zvechokwadi, kukwanisa kuva munzvimbo yake, teerera pane zvaunotaura "nenzeve dzake," mune mamwe mazwi, nyatsoteerera mumwe nomumwe.
Uye yekupedzisira.
Zvibvunze kuti: "Ndeipi mufaro weupenyu hwemhuri, uye munhu ari nyore kufara?"
Zvichida wakafungidzira zvakarurama, mhinduro yacho iri nyore - zvechokwadi, rudo, kuvimba, unyoro, chido, kuziva kuti iwe hauna maturo, asi unoda uye unokwanisa kubatsira vamwe vanhu, kugamuchira rubatsiro mukudzoka. Ndinofunga zvose. Pano iwe unogona kuwedzera kuchengeteka kwemhuri yemhuri, hutano hwevakaroorana uye pakupedzisira, mazhinji, mazhinji, mazhinji anofadza nguva dzinopedzerwa pamwechete.
Muhupenyu hwakagoverwa, zviparadzanisa zvose muhafu: zvose kushungurudzika uye mufaro, nokuti iwe - mahafu maviri ayo munhu wacho akazara.