Nyika yemunhu mumwe nomumwe inosanganisira vanhu vaanotaurirana navo uye avo vakachinja hupenyu hwake muhucheche, kuyaruka, kukura. Kukura, munhu anowedzera kusarudza nzvimbo dzake uye nzira dzokukurukura nevanhu vakasiyana. Zvisinei, munhu wese anowanikwa muhupenyu hwevanhu vose, avo vaanoona zuva rega rega, avo vaanotaura navo zuva rega rega, asi haafungi kuti kukurukurirana navo kunobata hupenyu hwake. Ndezvevakidzani.
Kazhinji, vachiyeuka avo vanozivana navo, vanoyeuka vavakidzani vari munzvimbo yekupedzisira, asi ava vanhu vanogara nesu "chaizvoizvo" kuburikidza nemadziro "uye ndiani, kana tichida kana kwete, ane hupenyu hwedu, zvisinei kana tichida kana kwete. Ngatitsvakei kuti ndiani "muvakidzani" ndiye uye anosarudza kuti tingararama sei naye.
"Muvakidzani" Ari muvakidzani
Wakacherechedza kuti kazhinji paunenge uchitaura nezvevakidzani, vanhu vazhinji vanoyeuka chaizvo avo vanhu vanounza matambudziko - kuita runyararo, debauch, makuhwa, kutaura, nezvimwewo? Ie. Pfungwa chaiyo ye "muvakidzani" muupenyu hwezuva nezuva inonyanya kuipa, inotakurwa nemavara asina kuoma anoguma ave muitiro wakasimba wemunhu. Iye "akaipa", "kwete", "mumwe munhu". Ichokwadi, izvi hazvisi pangozi.
Nyanzvi dzakawanda dzesayenzi dzinofunga kuti hutsinye hwemuvakidzani hunogara munzvimbo dzakadzama dzekusaziva uye dzinouya kubva paMatombo Age, apo kushungurudzika kwehupenyu nekuchengetedzwa kwemhuri kwakadzidzisa vanhu kusiyanisa zvose zvakapoteredza "zvavo" uye "mumwe munhu". Izvi zvakaitika apo paiva nehondo kune zvigadzirwa, ndima, vana; apo kuonekwa kunharaunda yemunharaunda, iyo inogona kufungidzirwa muzviuru zvemakiromita makiromita, yakasvikirwa kuva mutorwa. Uye chaizvoizvo nokuti anthropologists, masayendisiti anotaura kuti, kune munhu wemazuva ano, nokuda kwekushaya kwehondo, zvinokosha kuti iite izvi kurwisa kunze nenzira yekuumba muvengi mufananidzo. "Tino" zorora kumba "" ivo "vanogara shure," isu "tinopemberera zuva rekuberekwa -" ivo "vanofamba kubva usiku kusvikira mangwanani," tino "kugadzirisa kana paine mhedziso yega" - "vanogogodza masikati neusiku," isu " nguva dzose taura nezvechiitiko - "ivo" vanonamatira mhino dzavo kunze kwebhizimisi ravo.
Zvakangoita zvepanyama kuti kana uchingopinda muimba itsva, kunyange kwechinguva, munhu anotanga kuongorora chiyero chekukanganisika kwezvakatipoteredza uye vanhu vari pedyo naye. Tisinganzwisisi, tinonamatira zvakananga kumufananidzo wakajeka uye, sokuita kudaro, sarudza kuti "achatidzivirira kurarama."
Heano chimwe chiitiko chinowanzoitika, vazhinji vanozviona ivo mumamiriro ezvinhu aya, izvo hazvishamisi. Zvakanyanya zviri nani - zvichange zviri nyore kwauri kuti unzwisise pfungwa yatiri kuedza kuisa kune vese vanoverenga. Saka, kudzokera kumusha mushure mebasa, kuneta, kurota kuzorora, kukanda pfungwa dzose kubva mumusoro wakazara, tinobvumira kufunga kwedu kwekunzwisisa kugovera nzira yedu yepakutanga, saka zvinowanzoitika kuti pamusana penyanga shomanana wrestler uye mudziviriri anomuka mukati medu. Imba yangu ndiyo nhare yangu. Imba ndiyo nzvimbo yatinozorora. Izvo chete zvakasiyana nevevanhu vepakutanga munyika yezvino, nevavakidzani vedu, hatiparadzanisi miganhu inotenderwa, asi munzanga-mupfungwa - "upenyu hwedu" / "hupenyu hwavo".
"Muvakidzani wangu"
Pasina nzira dzakadzivirirwa dzakachengetedzwa, tinofunga kuti tinogona kutarisana nemhando dzose dzesimba uye mukati medu, sezvakadaro, tinoziva, tinobvumirana kuti pane mumwe munhu "anogona kutitadzisa kurara", "anogona kutitadzisa kurarama," isu tinotendera kuti tive chimwe chinhu chakamanikidzwa. Uye kunyanya "isu" tinodzivirira, tinorwisana, kunyanya "ivo" vanogumbura, "musafunga" nezve "isu".
Hongu, "ivo" havakuregerei muupenyu hwavo, saka sei muchivabvumira "ivo" mupfungwa dzenyu, muhupenyu hwenyu, vachikubvumira kuparadza rugare rwenyu? Yeuka mahofisi emahofisi, ayo anongonyarara pa 3-4 o'clock mangwanani. Disco clubs, vana vavakidzani, shamwari nevanasikana vavakidzani, vana vachangoberekwa, vachitsvaga zvidzidzo zvisingagumi uye mazano, vachitaura nezve "hapana chavanoita" uye pasinei nemamiriro ezvinhu akadaro, vakawanda vakavata, uye vakadzidza zvakakwana, uye vakataurirana pachena nevamwe vanhu. Uye vana vakakurira muimba yemajeri vanogona kurara pasi pemhando ipi zvayo uye mhere-mhere? Vanozviita sei? Ichokwadi ndechokuti, kugadziriswa muhostele, munhu anoziva chii chakumumirira uye anobvuma ichi chaicho sezvazviri, anobvuma vanhu vanogara imomo, nenzira yavari. Mukupedzisira, shure kwezvose, chinhu chakakoshesa ndechekuti unofanirana sei nevanhu.
Zvakakosha kunzwisisa kuti pane chimwe chinhu chakafanana pakati pako, chii chinokubatanidza iwe, uye kune mitemo, zvivharo uye zvakavanzika, pamusoro pekuvapo kwekuti munhu wose angazviziva. Tumira izvi muupenyu hwako. Chii chaunofanana nacho nevavakidzani vako? Nzvimbo inowanzowanikwa, inowanzopinda, imba yakajairika, yard yard. Izvi ndizvo zvinoita vavakidzani "vedu" maererano nevanhu vanobva kune dzimwe nzvimbo, dzimba, masuo. Uye vose vanogara pedyo newe vane biography inosangana neimba ino, imba, mumugwagwa. Imba nemugwagwa maunogara. Ie. uye iwe uri "ivo" pachavo biography. Hapana anozobuda munzvimbo inogaramo uye kumhanyira, kuchinja hupenyu hwavo pamudzi, nokuti "mumwe munhu ari kutitadzisa"? Uye kupi kumhanya? Kune imwechete "vamwe", "vanhu vasingazivikanwi"? Saka, kutanga, kuita kuti upenyu huve nyore, unongoda kubvuma kuti iwe nevavakidzani vako munharaunda imwe chete. Pasinei nemafungiro evasayendisiti vakawanda pamusoro pekurwa kwevanhu, nhoroondo inoratidza kuti hapana yemifananidzo yakavezwa yakaratidza chero chinhu chinogona kuratidzira kukakavadzana kwakapfuura pakati pevanhu. Nokuda kweizvi nguva maiva nemafungiro emunharaunda yenyika uye zvose zvisikwa zvepanyika. Sezvo wagamuchira nzvimbo yako, iwe watotora hafu yehondo. Iye zvino, atova mukati memhara ino, iwe unogona kuisa mitemo.
Mitemo yeZVIMWE UPENYU
Rugare kugara nevavakidzani
Mukati mitemo, iyo vanhu pachavo vanovatsigira mukukurukurirana kwezuva nezuva kune umwe neumwe - mazano. Iyi ndiyo mitemo inonyanya kuzivikanwa nekucherechedza - kwete kugadzira mhere yakasimba kwete chete pashure pekunge 23.00, asiwo masikati, inyevera vavakidzani kana kugadzirisa kwakarongeka kana vashanyi vakawanda vanosvika pakupemberera zuva uye apo izvi zvange zvava kupera. Uyewo, usanetseka nevavakidzani nekukumbira kakawanda kushandisa foni, kukwereta munyu, usaratidza kufarira kwakanyanya muhupenyu hwehupenyu, uye kana uchifanira kugadzirisa chikumbiro, saka zvishoma zvingaita kuti upinde muimba uye uzvitore zvishoma kana ikarambwa. Mukuwedzera, zvakakosha kuziva nzira yekuchenesa matanho uye kutora mazamu akapiswa.
Kukosha kukuru mukurarama pamwechete nevavakidzani kunowedzerwa nekuziva kwako nokungwarira nenzira yavo yehupenyu, mhuri yavo. Zvakakosha kuziva izvi sekuremekedza humwe humwe humwe uye sangano rekugadzirisa zvinetso zvekubatana. Kutanga kubva pamatambudziko ekuvandudza imba yako uye yadhi uye kumatambudziko apo iwe kana vavakidzani vako pane rimwe zuva tinofanira kutarirana kune umwe neumwe rubatsiro rwemunhu oga. Mushure mezvose, pane zviitiko apo mumwe wehama anowira achirwara, uye mumusuwo ikoko anogara chiremba anogona kubatsira mumaminitsi ekutanga. Kana iwe ungada kubatsirwa nokukurumidza kana, somuenzaniso, pombi inopera. Zviri nyore uye zvakanyanya kuvimbwa kushanda kune vanhu vanoziva kupfuura vatorwa.
Asi zvakakosha paunosangana kuti uchengetedze kunyanya kweuchenjeri uye ruremekedzo. Kana ukasarudza kuzivana pakutanga, sechisarudzo, iwe unogona kukoka muvakidzani wako (vavakidzani) kuti akushanyirei nokuda kweii neinotapira. Iwe unogona pane zvinopesana uuye nekubata kune vavakidzani, uende nayo, asi usapinda muimba, kana usina kukokwa. Usabvunza vanhu nezvehupenyu hwehupenyu hwavo, nezvekurerwa kwevana uye nezvimwe hama dzisipo. Usapa chero mazano. Uye usaita shamwari. Yeuka kuti uku ndiko kushanyira kwekuremekedza nekuzivana. Ratidza kuti uri chii uye utaure mune zviitiko zvipi iwe unogona kuvimba kana pane rubatsiro rwekubatsira.
Kakawanda zviitiko apo vanhu vanoziva, kana vane zvinhu zvinodiwa, vanowanzogara. Somuenzaniso, vanaamai vanovakidzana vanofamba nevana mune rimwe bhokisi rejecha kana varume vavo vane motokari. Muchiitiko ichi, kufambidzana kunoitika, kune rumwe rutivi, nekukurumidza, asi kune rumwe rutivi rwakaoma zvakaoma. Nokuti nekuda kweruzhinji rwezvido zvinogona kuva chirevo chekuparadzanisa kwakakwana kwezvido nehupenyu hwose, kunyengera kungasimuka kuti muvakidzani wako atova shamwari yako. Nokudaro mufambiro wakaipa, ruzivo rwakagamuchirwa, kusadzivirirwa kufarira kudzidza zvakawanda pamusoro pehupenyu hweumwe munhu, chido chokupa chimwe chinhu, kutaurira nhoroondo yako, nezvimwe. Usashamiswa uye kugumburwa, kana uri munyaya iyi iwe uchasangana nekupikiswa kwezvinangwa zvako zvakanaka. Nzvimbo yako muvakidzani, kwete shamwari, kwete hama. Uye basa rako mubasa remuvakidzani nderokuita kuti iwe newe pachako ugare wakasununguka kurarama. Izvi zvinoitika kuti ukama hwakanaka hunova hukama hukama, asi izvi zvinowanzoitika uye zvinoda kungwarira.
Nzira yekugadzirisa kusawirirana nevavakidzani
Mitemo yekunze inotungamirirwa nemutemo, asi, nhamo, inowanzoputswa. Uye kana iwe ukaona zvakaoma kusingafungi nemimhanzi huru kunze kwemasvingo, kutsika-tsika uye kupopota, kana mumamiriro ezvinhu aya unoona zvakaoma kuisa pfungwa pahupenyu hwako, edza kuitei kuburikidza nehondo, kuburikidza nemvumo yake. Muchiitiko ichi pane nzira mbiri: mutemo neimba. Chokutanga, tinosarudza kuti ndeupi wavo achishandisa. Kuti uite izvi, sarudza kuti ndiani ari mberi kwako, zvaanofunga, izvo zvaanofunga, iye ane shamwari, ndiani ane simba rake, chii chinokosha kwaari, nezvimwe zvakadaro. Kana iwe usingazivi chinhu chakadai uye usingadi kunyange kuziva, saka tinokurudzira, zvisingaiti, kuti tisaisa mukana wekutanga mukutaurirana chero zvido zvese uye taura chete zvinyararire uye zvine mutsa. Uye zvechokwadi, usatyisidzira, usatombotaura, kuti usaita kuti uwedzere kuwedzera. Zvichida vavakidzani vako vakangokura mwana, uye vabereki kwenguva yakati vasara. Muchiitiko ichi, zviri nani kutaura nevabereki, sezvo wakanyevera pamusoro peiyi mudiki. Uye tarisai. Sezvo mutemo, izvi zvinopera, vana vanokura. Uye vavakidzani vanogara.
Ikoko kune sarudzo apo imba inobhadhara uye hakuna munhu ane mhosva yezvinoitika ipapo, haatakuri. Ichokwadi ndechokuti muridzi weimba, mushure mekusaina chibvumirano, haisi pamba iyi kusvikira chibvumirano ichipera. Vagari vemunharaunda pamwe naye vangatombotaura kunyange kana asingadi. Uyewo sangano revaridzi vepamba havana ruzivo panyaya iyi. Kufanana kwakasiyana nevavakidzani vakaoma zvinokwanisika kuwedzera vanhu vane doro vasina kunyatsonzwisisa zvamunokumbira, uye kunyange kazhinji - havangoyeuki kuti wakauya kwavari. Mumamiriro ezvinhu akadaro, pane zviitiko apo kushaniswa kumwe kumapurisa kwakabatsirwa nehupoti pamusoro pe "vanhu vanofungidzira" vari kupinda muimba iyoyo kana vanhu avo mapurisa anoita sevari kutsvaga. Iwe hauzive kuti ndiani anogara ikoko uye chii chiri kuitika!
Apo vavakidzani vachiita ruzha hazvizivikanwi kana kuti hurukuro dzorugare hazvibatsire, unogona kushandisa zvakasarudzwa nemutemo - kushevedza mapurisa. Asi isu tinofanira kunge takagadzirira kuti zvinotora zvakawanda, miviri nemigumisiro inogona kutarisirwa kwenguva refu. Kudana kuri nani 02. Kudanwa kwako kuchagadziriswa mumagazini uye sarudzo yako ichaendeswa kumapurisa emunharaunda, mushure mokunge utongi huchaitwa - chii chakaitwa pachikumbiro ichi. Iwe unogonawo kushandisa mapurisa nekunyora, zviri nani pamwe (shure kwezvose, izvi zvinoitwa nevavakidzani hazvidziviriri iwe chete). Chikumbiro muhofisi chinofanira kunyoreswa newe kana kutumirwa ne mail yakanyoreswa, sezvo yakanyevera nezvayo. Mhinduro yacho inofanira kupiwa mukati memwedzi mushure mekunyora kwekushanda kwako. Uye kana ukasarudza kuenda nenzira iyi, unofanira kupedzisa mutengo kusvikira ruzha ruchimira zvachose, nokuti kana ukadzokera, mune ramangwana zviito zvako hazvingazotorwa zvakanyanya nevavakidzani vane ruzha kana mapurisa anobva kushanya kwemaitiro.
Chinonyanya kukosha, iwe waunogara naye uye chero hukama huri kuvaka, yeuka kuti mushure mechinguva izvi zvose zvichavawo chikamu chenhoroondo, yako inowanikwa munharaunda yehupenyu. Uye kana mamiriro ehupenyu achikurambana iwe, sezvinoratidzira, unofanana nevavakidzani kuti iwe uchagara uchingoyeuka neushamwari hwekushanda.
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